The Dance

I love my new ipod that Carl got me for mother's day. My sister recently gave me an old set of speakers for it. The kids love it because we have been listening to Paws and Tales and Jonathan Park on it. I usually play music or an episode while I am fixing dinner. I came downstairs this afternoon to fix dinner and the house was a mess. We had to leave for church soon so I was flustered. Ever get that way ladies? I cannot stand for my house to be a mess. I know, it is something I am working on. The kids had drawing paper all over the place and markers and crayons too. I should have been happy with all the pictures they tried to show me. All I saw was a mess. The Lord caused something to happen that kind of put things in perspective. I was putting the hot dogs on to cook (yes I know hot dogs for dinner is not the healthiest.) I had just finished cutting up some fruit (see I did include something good for them to eat.) I had put some music on more to drown out the chaos than anything. It was country music (yes I know but it was Randy Travis so it was not all that bad.) I was kind of dancing around the kitchen when it happened. Daniel came over to me and looked up with his beautiful blue eyes. "Dance with me Mommy." My heart melted. I picked him up and held him close and we danced around the kitchen. His little head was tucked into my neck and he was hanging on with his little arms wrapped around my neck. I closed my eyes and savored the moment. What if I had been too busy or preoccupied and had missed this precious moment? As we twirled around he lifted his head up and yelled for all his sibling. "Look at me dancing with Mommy." In my own mind I knew that this small act had made him feel loved and accepted. As the song ended and I put him down he ran off to play with the rest of the kids. They were in the process of chasing each other with light sabers. A tear rolled down my cheek and I grieved for all the missed opportunities with each child. I remember all the times I told them I was too busy or made them feel unimportant by my actions or words. I made a commitment right there to let go of my pride in the fact that the house always has to be clean. Who cares if it is a mess right now? One day there will be no children to make it a mess. My relationship with my kids is more important that any thing or possession. Especially in a big family kids tend to feel left out. I need to make a concerted effort to make each child feel loved and accepted and special. I want my children to remember the times I twirled them around the kitchen. Not that my house was clean all the time. I want to pass on to them traditions of dances, special plates, and mommy and me time. I can make each meal and event of our lives special. It all starts with me and my attitude. So from this day forth I intend to dance more and clean less (and yes, Baptists do dance!)