Advent Day 2

Well, really it is day 3. We were supposed to start on Tuesday but I was preparing and Baba was watching the kids overnight so I could get some things done. I got all the presents wrapped, the planning done, and found the bottom of one of the hampers. We had ten loads of laundry from vacation last week. I am still catching up.
I am glad that I am done with all the presents. I have spent too many Decembers focused so much on what to get everyone that I forget to put the focus where it should be. On Christ. This year I vowed would be different. I actually started in November doing a study called, Preparing Your Heart for Advent. I then made the decision to be done shopping by December. That goal is now complete as all the kids gifts are bought and wrapped. We are doing for gifts this year. Something they want. Something they need. Something they wear. Something they read. It made shopping so much easier and focused. What a huge relief to be done.
The next thing I really started focusing on was of course the actual focus of Christ. What did I want to do. I really have always wanted to celebrate advent like I did as a child. Tis year I made the commitment to do it. I did a lot of research and decided to do a Jesse Tree this year. We have a scripture, ornament, and reflection each night. The kids copy work and verses for school all come from the devotions. We did an intro and creation yesterday. I explained what a Jesse tree is and why we use that. We also talked about creation and what happened on each day. I so need to review that more often, I got a little confused. Tonight we did the first sin and discussed the fact that Eve was not  alone when she ate the fruit. Adam was "with her". We also talked about shifting blame and taking responsibility for your own sin. The kids and fun coloring the sheets and ornaments. We need to do some training with the little ones to be more still.
Another thing we did was to open a book each night until Christmas. I wrapped 28 books with paper and we read one a night. The kids are so excited to open the book and read. I am really liking this new tradition. Tonight we read Max Lucado's You Are Special. What a cute story. I can't wait to see what we read tomorrow. Since they are wrapped it is a surprise to me too.

Epic fail

What a day. Do you ever make a commitment to the Lord and the first day you embark on the journey you end falling flat on your face? Do you ever wish you could just erase a day from the memory of your children? Yeah, today was that kind of day. Epic failure to the 100th degree. Oh, boy. I had such high hopes. I met with Carrie Irish last night and had a wonderful conversation. It was so good to talk and pray with another Christian woman. We decided to work on two words this week and hold each other accountable. The two words were prayer and joy. These are two things we agreed that both of us need to work on. I started a prayer journal last night and even prayed when I woke up in the middle of the night. This morning I awoke and wrote again. Good start even if I did wake up late. The day just went downhill from there with me going to the prayer journal over and over again confessing my horrible, rotten, angry spirit all day. The kids got on my every nerve today. Everyone complained all day. Alex got very angry today and threw a chair at me over school. The kids destroyed the house every time I cleaned it up. The phone was ringing off the hook with telemarketers ( thank you time Warner cable company). Everywhere I turned I was met with something that just made me angry. I spent the whole day trying to recover and it just did not work. Add football practice and a husband who was running late to the mix and no food in the house to fix dinner and it was a recipe for disaster. I am currently out of butter,  eggs,  cheese,  lunch meat, meat, chicken, cereal. Oh I so need to go grocery shopping. We ended up at McDonald's for dinner. Needless to say my prayer journal for today is full of pleading for mercy and grace and a whole lot of confession. Tomorrow will begin with confession to my children for showing them a bad example. Oh how wonderful the Lord is to give us a new day each morning. How much more wonderful is it that he removes our sins as far as the east is from the west when we confess them. Epic failure today, you bet. Tomorrow is a new day and will I fall again, probably. But I will keep on praying and confessing and praying some more.

True Repentance

I have been given a great view of repentance lately. The latest incident came from my sweet Esther. It needs a little bit of background information first. Carl and I met about three weeks ago for a very important date night. I had been praying very hard lately about some things in our marriage. Since we got back from vacation things have not been good and they were getting worse. Without airing all the dirty details, let's just say things were really bad. I was suffering from depression and Carl was angry, all the time. The kids were suffering and Alex especially was starting to act out violently towards me. I was at the end of my rope. The Lord has really been working on my heart about where my joy comes from. For our entire marriage I have been struggling with finding my joy in my marriage and how Carl feels about me. Lately we have not been very loving toward one another so obviously I did not think too highly of myself. The Lord finally knocked me flat and made me realize that my joy and strength comes from HIM. Now, I know this and have known it for my entire Christian life but saying it and putting it into practice are two different things. Carl has been struggling with his priorities and putting God first in his life. Things came to a point on that date night that things were either going to change or drastic measure would have to be taken. Carl met with one of the elders the following Monday. I knew he was meeting in the morning and was praying hard. I was shocked to see Carl come home about 2:00 in the afternoon. He NEVER does this. I was scared to hear what he had to say. The last time he came home in the middle of the day it was not good news. He told me that he had been praying for several HOURS! The Lord was really dealing with him and he came home to ask forgiveness and repent. I was shocked and so proud of him. Things got even better on Saturday when he went to my parents and asked their forgiveness. WOW! The next day was Sunday and Carl had been planning to go before the church and repent. I knew this was the real test of whether this repentance was real. I had seen changes already in him but really needed to see him do this. He walked right up to the front of the church with one of the elders and truly repented. He asked my forgiveness and the kids and even the churches for not treating his family as God intended. I was crying especially when the men of the church gathered around him right at the front of the church and prayed for him. It was amazing to hear their prayers and see grown men wrap their arms around my husband in great big bear hugs. I was thankful, amazed, tearful, and joyful all the same time. It has taken us many years and many struggles to get to this point. I realize that Carl did not mess up this family on his own. I take part of the blame in this. Carl and I have been drawing closer to God each day and closer to each other. We have never communicated as well as we have these past couple weeks. Perfection, NO! Grace and mercy and forgiveness, YES!!!!!! Carl getting up and repenting before the church did more to make me trust and love him than anything he has ever done in our whole marriage. I am so proud of MY MAN!!!!! Now back to the story about Esther. We have been reading Hero Tales as part of Bible in school. We were reading about Moody this week. Each story has character qualities that the kids need to copy and illustrate. One of them this week was repentance. Esther copied the definition: repentance is not just saying you're sorry for sin, but going in a new direction. Her drawing is what brought tears to my eyes. She drew a picture of Carl before the church repenting. She drew the people and the elders and everything. I was just so thankful for the wonderful picture of repentance that God has given to our family. Please pray as now that we are starting to make some changes that the fiery darts of Satan would be useless against our family.

The rest of the story

Alex woke up for church and felt fine. He was fine all through church. After lunch I started to notice that he was really quiet and kind of off by himself. He eventually came to me and said he had a headache. I told him we would get ready to go. An hour later, yes I know, we finally left. We stopped by Pelicans, a snowball stand for you Northern people, on the way home. Alex did not finish his snowball and now I knew he did not feel well. He kind of perked up at home. I decided to take a nap for a while, a very rare luxury. The kids were either napping, watching TV, or working with Carl. Carl had to go to home depot around 5:00. He took two of the kids with him. When he left Alex expressed a desire to bake something. I was encouraged that he was finally feeling better. He picked a recipe and got out all the ingredients. He loves to bake and I normally just let him do his thing. He came to me about 10 minutes later and told me he needed my help. He told me he needed help concentrating. Red flags started going off in my head. I jumped up and went to help him. I asked him to read the first ingredient. He said "flour". So far so good. I then asked him to read the measurement and that is when I grabbed the phone to call the doctor. He could not read it. He got very upset at this point. I noticed his face was ticking and he started wandering around the kitchen mumbling. Things kind of got scary at this point. I was trying to call Carl to tell him to get home NOW! I accidentally called my mom and freaked her out. She was in church at the time. I found out later that she immediately left church and was ready to come up to our house but my dad stopped her. At this point Alex's speech went haywire. He could not form any words and his eyes just started to look around vacantly. I sat him down on the ground and had enough knowledge to know that I had to get everything out of his way. The thing that upset me the most was once I got him down on the ground he began to speak again, except it was only one word. He looked right at me and just kept repeating the word "please" over and over again. I lost it. I could do nothing to help him. I gently laid him down on the floor and yelled at one of the kids to get a pillow. That is when things got even crazier. Carl called and I not so gently told him to GET HOME! Nathan is standing over Alex asking what is wrong. Tirzah is crawling over Alex and trying to get him to play. The doctor calls back and at the moment I turned to pick up the phone Alex went into a full blown seizure. At this point I am screaming at the nurse. She tells me to hang up and call 911. Don't know how my hands managed to dial the number, keep Tirzah off Alex, move the high chair, and yank Alex's glasses off his face but I did. I just remember calling out to God LOUDLY over and over. The 911 operator must have thought I was crazy. I managed to get out what was happening. The seizure only lasted a minute but it felt like forever. I have never been so scared in my life. Carl decides to walk in the door at this moment. I hand him the phone because I just want to hold my son at this moment. Alex actually gets a little combative right after the seizure. By the time the calvary arrives he is no longer convulsing and is in the typical post seizure state. After they assure us that he is fine I feel a little better. I am trying to type all this before the kids all wake up but my window of time has ended. I will continue the story at a later time, hopefully tonight.

The Last Few Days

Complete and utter exhaustion. That is how I feel right now. I am so tired that I cannot sleep. Have you ever been there? It has been a whirlwind of a few days. Let me start back a few weeks ago. We went on vacation to Colorado. It was a very stressful trip with wrecking the van, breaking my foot, and several other injuries to various children. I came home to about 20 loads of laundry and all the unpacking. Carl had army duty the day we got back so he was not able to help me. He did as much as he could and he was so sweet trying to take a lot of the load off of me. The next few weeks I truly believe that I was in a cycle of severe depression. I did not get a lot done and just sat around. I was overwhelmed with the upcoming school year and trying to deal with some behavior issues that are evident in the kids. It has really been in the last week and half that the Lord has really been working in my heart. I was trying to do everything in my own power and I was failing miserably. I decided to just emerse myself in things of the Lord. I starting really making time for Him. My prayer life increased and so did my joy. I started to really feel like I could get back on track with my relationship with the Lord. The kids and I started reading the book Crazy Love together and I really started to see some changes in them. I think now now that the Lord was preparing my heart for what happened this weekend. He knew that I needed to be close to him to get through the last couple days. It all began with William. He came in our room about 5:30 on Saturday morning. We had spent Friday at the beach so we all were very tired and had slept well. He came in and told me that Alex was shaking the bed so bad that Alex woke him up. Very groggy at this time in the morning it took me a minute to realize what he was saying. He finally got through to me that Alex was convulsing. When that finally hit me I jumped up and ran into his room. Alex had stopped shaking by this time but had fallen out of bed. When I found him he was unresponsive and had a huge amount of saliva bubbled in his mouth. That was when it really hit me what had happened. My sweet 13 year old teenager had experienced a seizure. Alex was completely out of it but we were finally able to get him in our room and everyone went back to sleep. Except for me. I stayed watching him and looking up seizures on my iPad. I really was questioning whether he really did have one since I did not witness it. Of course right as I drifted off to sleep Alex popped up and started asking me whether we were going to Baba's house and whether he could get dressed. He was fine and had no memory of what had happened. I now realize that this is very normal and his deep sleep and unresponsivness was him recovering from the seizure. We decided to take him to the doctor and got a 10:30 appointment. On the way there we stopped by Golden Corral and that is when I noticed he was acting strangely. He did not eat anything and for Alex that is unusual, especially since Golden Corral is his favorite restaurant. By the time we got to the doctor he was just not himself. He was answering questions with one word answers and ended up laying on the floor of the exam room. When the doctor did his exam he was dizzy and kind of falling all over the place. She call the neurologist and the fear was that he was continuing to have small seizures that we were unaware of. Off to the ER we went. About 10 minutes before we got there he completely perked up and became his normal self. They did nothing in the hospital but monitor him for a while and then send us home. They told us that we would need to see the neurologist the first thing on Monday morning. We went home thinking this was going to be a one time thing. I of course had him sleep in our room so I could keep an eye on him. The next morning, Sunday, he woke up fine so off to church we went. Right now I am very tired so I will continue the rest of the adventure at another time, hopefully not 3 months from now.

So tired

After my wonderful day with the Lord things took a bad turn. I have been sick ever since. I have this nasty cough that just won't away. I have lovingly passed it to several of my children. The first week it was just me who felt bad. That Friday Sam cut his foot with one of Alex's wood carving tools (it no longer belongs to Alex). Off to the doctor. The next day we were back to get Tirzah checked out for pink eye. Drops for her. It was funny because the doctor asked me if I wanted the drops that killed it immediately and was no longer contagious or the drops that takes 3 days to kill it was she would be contagious that whole time. Duh! Off to the pharmacy for medicine. Monday we were back because Tirzah had a well check. I also took in Daniel because he had a cut on his head. (the handiwork of my sweet Nathan - let's just say the boy has good aim.) While there Daniel was found to have an ear infection and wheezing. Breathing treatment while there. Lovely. Tirzah checked out okay. Tiny but normal. Whew! Finally some good news from the doctor. Tuesday we were back because Sam had some asthma issues during the night. Breathing treatment but just monitoring. Wednesday and Thursday we were in the clear. Just coughing at home. Thursday night though Sam spiked a fever of 102 degrees. He was twitching ad totally out of it all night. His breathing rate was 55 (for those lucky parents who do not need to know what a normal breathing rate for a 4 year old is this is very high - 20 is about normal for his age.) Back to the doctor on Friday. Everything checked out okay. No pneumonia or ear infection. Whew! Saturday we drove down to my mom's. We are planning on driving to West Virginia on Monday to see my grandmother. She has never met Tirzah or Caleb. Saturday night was a disaster. No one got any sleep. Sam coughed all night long. Daniel whined about his ear hurting. We had held off on the antibiotics for him hoping that the ear infection would just go away on its own. No such luck. Sam was not improved in the morning and was running a fever again. More breathing treatments and no improvememnt. Back to the doctor on Sunday morning. By the time I got there he was fine and acting normal. Ughhhhhhhhhh! This time she decided to out him on steroid since he has been coughing for over a week and one albuterol that whole time. I am tired. So is everyone else. On top of everything else we got a phone call from my aunt in WV. My grandmother is in ICU in congestive heart failure and has pneumonia. Now it is even more important for us to get up there. On a good note. My sweet, wonderful husband who was not planning to go to WV with us has decided that he needs to go with us to help out with the kids so I can visit with my grandmother. Please pray that we will get there safely and be able to visit with her. She has been sick for so long and misses my grandfather. She has a relationship with Jesus so she is at peace with dying. She keeps saying that she just wants to go home. Please pray that this week will be less eventful than last week. Pray for strength for me as I continue to have a cough and that I will not get discouraged.

A day with the Lord

Carl had a conference in Wilmington this Monday. He had to be down there on Sunday night. Being the thoughtful and wonderful husband that he is he invited me to go along for a much needed day of rest. On Saturday we went to the museum of life and science's robot rumble with the kids. They had a great time. Caleb behaved himself for being in the stroller for the whole time. Esther, Nathan, Daniel, and William all got to control the robots for the bot hockey. They had a great time. We then went over my mom's house for a postponed Easter dinner. We had my mom's famous roast (courtesy of COSTCO), mashed potatoes, rolls, corn, punch, and cake for dessert. The kids had a good time guessing how many jelly beans were in the centerpiece. My mom won with a guess of 250. There were 246 in the jar. She is a good at estimating. We left the kids at my mom's house and left for home. We went to church in the morning where we enjoyed actually listening to the sermon instead of making kids be quiet. It was a good thing because we were able to hear about the church's vision for multividying. We are going to be dividing the church in two better geographic ones. We will be able to reach more people and grow more. We are excited.
After church went home to pack and head off to Wilmington. We checked into the hotel and walked along the river walk to Elijah's. We had a nice leisurely meal while watching the sun set. It was great. We walked back to the hotel and Carl worked on his presentation while I read my bible. No television or music. Just reading the word of God uninterrupted.
Carl left in the morning and Tirzah and I packed up the room and went down for breakfast. We ate at the hotel restaurant. We were able to eat outside and enjoy the great breakfast buffet. I even was able to get my meal for free. The very nice waitress was able to work it out for me. It pays to be very nice to people. After breakfast Tirzah and I took a walk on the river walk. I came back to the hotel and sat by the pool. It was in the shade. I spent the next several hours in God's word. Literally reading the bible for three hours is something I had not done in a very long time. I can't tell you how good it was to do that. I just kept reading and reading. I had brought other books to read but did not really get to them. It was just me and God all day. I did break for lunch but then came back to the hotel and read some more. Carl came back about 4:30 and we packed up to leave. On the way home Carl and I were able to talk about some of the things that God had revealed to me that day.
It was a great day and one that was long overdue. I have come to realize that I need to do this every 3 months or so. It is so important for me to make my relationship with Christ the most important thing.
Satan was not happy with the day I spent with the Lord. He had been attacking me this week. I have not felt well since we returned. Today I struggled with a migraine. I will not let him ruin what the Lord put on my heart. Pray that the joy from this day will not be stolen from me. I pray that other women will realize the importance of getting alone with the Lord.

A Fire Hazard

While I was driving down the road to the mall today (I had to return Alex's broken crocs) I heard a phrase in a song that just sttod out to me. I cannot remember the name of the song. I think it was by Lyndsay Taylor. I cannot even remember the exact wording of the prhase. All I can remember is that it was talking about a dry field and how they are the ones prone to fire. It just struck me that when my life is dry in regards to my relationship with Christ that I am opening myself up to the possibility of a fire. Now I know that God can send a trial our way when our relationship with him is going great. We are more prone to a fire of our own making though when we leave oursleves dry. It seems like I have been going through a dry spell lately, more like a drought. I want to, no I need to, make sure that I am working on making my relationship with Christ one that is flourishing and abundant. It take a lot of effort but it needs to be the number one priority in my life. When I do this all the other relationships in my life are right where they need to be. I don't want to live in a drought. I want a flourishing life.

Just Because

And yes, I do realize that Alex is not in any of these pictures. What can I say? I try but he just runs away. If I find one I will post it.

Filthy Rags

I am amazed sometimes at how God literally will put a bullseye on something we need to work on. Our ladies Bible study has been dealing with the issue of anger. We have been watching S.M. Davis' series on anger. Yesterday was our study night. That morning I read my devotional and was just blown away. The verse was Colossians 3:12.


12 Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. 14 And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. 16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. 17 And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

The NIV uses the word clothe instead of put on. The devotional I was reading was relating this passage to what people see us wearing. Not physical clothing but spiritual clothing. I can wake up in the morning and choose to put on compassion, kindness, humility, meekness and patience. That is what I want to do. Too often though I put on impatience, anger, wrath, and all the other things that I desire to get rid of in my life like selfishness and pride. When I put on these things I am literally putting on filthy rags. That is what I am showing my children. I am teaching them to put on filth. What an image. Whenever I get angry or impatient I am showing my children filth. I desire above all else to show my husband,my children, and my God the clothing of a follower of God. I desire to let compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience reign in my life. It is a choice I need to make each morning before my feet hit the floor. I need to choose to put on these things in the middle of the day when I am tempted to put on my filthy clothes.
I am reminded of the Febreeze commercials where the people are blindfolded. They are taken to places that are disgusting and filthy and they are asked what they smell. They smell the febreeze all over the place and none of the filth. That is how my filthy clothes of pride and anger are. I have them on a lot but no one knows. I hide and mask it. I think we are all good at covering up those parts of our life that we don't want anyone to see. The bad thing is we hide it from strangers and acquaintances but the ones we love the most see it and are often the recipients of our anger and impatience and general filth. Shouldn't the ones we love get to see the compassion and love and kindness more than the people we may not even know.
I determine to let my husband and children get the good things in my life. I want them to know without a doubt that they have my love. I don't want to be remembered for my filthy clothes. I want to be remembered by the good things I put on every day. Yes. it's hard. Especially when I have been putting on this filth for years. I am working hard to study the Bible and glean information from those who have been where I am. I want to change. Not for my husband and children, but for my grandchildren and the generation that will come after me. How will I be remembered? By my filth. I pray that this will not be the case. Pray for me as I endeavor each day to put on the clothing of love and peace and patience and understanding.

Valentines Day

Carl and I have been trying not to eat out as much. For Valentines Day I decided to make a nice dinner at home. I planned a nice breakfast of Raspberry Cream Cheese Stuffed French Toast. All I can say is wow! They were so yummy and there were no pieces left for Carl. I decorated the table all for Valentines Day. The kids thought it was really cool. For lunch we went out to Moe's. I know I said we were trying not to eat out as much but I knew that I was going to be busy preparing for dinner so I wanted a little break. I came home and started cooking. I made cupcakes from scratch. The frosting I bought (I know - cheating right). I then made homemade foccia bread but cut it into heart shapes. I put olive oil, salt, and feta cheese on them. They were awesome and there are none left. My next thing was homemade tiramisu. It is Carl's favor tie dessert. I made homemade ladyfingers (twice actually). The first time I made them I did not beat the eggs enough and even though they tasted good they were flat. The second attempt was much better. The kids were happy because they got to eat all the first batch. It tasted okay. The coffee was too strong. I will make it again but with a weaker coffee. We had chicken alla cacciatore, green beans, roastedpotatoes, and pink lemonade punch (pink lemonade, sprite, and raspberry sherbet.) The kids loved it all. Carl got me a food processor, candles, tea, and popcorn. I know they say that appliances for presents are not good but I am very excited. When I went to Walmart last Thursday I hit the toy clearance jackpot. I got toy story 3 figurines for $1. Those were for the little guys. They also got a Cars 2 aqua doodle pad that I found for $4. The big ones got Ben 10 figurines that I found for $1. Everyone got a Cars 2 lego set that was regularly $60 but I found it for $10. The kids were overjoyed because they normally don't get anything for Valentines Day. My favorite part of the evening was when Carl and the boys joined me in reading scripture cards I had made. Each card had a verse that dealt with God's love for us printed on the back. It was a great day, one where I showed my sweet blessing how much I love them.

Catch Up

Wow! It has been a busy month. February always is. Two close birthdays and Valentines Day. Alex turned 13 on the 3rd and Carl turned 40 on the 7th. It was a great time. Alex's brithday fell on a Friday. He spent Wednesday through Saturday at my mom's celebrating with them. They came to the house on Saturday to celebrate with another family from church. That gave Carl time to set up his present. We bought him a trampoline. He has been asking for one for years. We finally decided that it would be a good investment. He was so surprised. He loved it and the kids jump on it everyday. Carl's birthday was a big one too. He wanted to have a party but with homeschooling, nursing Tirzah, taking care of eight children, and all the other things I do during the day I did not have time to plan one. I fixed him a good dinner and decorated the house. We made poster board cards for him and posted them to the garage so he would see them when he came in. I also made him two apple pies, his favorite. It was a small family affair but we had a good time. Carl and I dropped the kids off at my mom's house on Friday after his birthday so we could go out. We had a parenting seminar on Friday night so we out for brunch at the Farmer's Market Restaurant. We had a good time and Carl finally got his birthday present. He has been researching tools. He needed a neww drill and decided on a Kobalt set. He is quite pleased. It was a busy week for me with big, special meals to fix but it was all worth it to make my precious men feel special.

Menu for Alex's Birthday
Daddy's Special Hamburgers
Hot Dogs
Chips
Ice Cream Cake

Presents
Trampoline
Art supplies
T-shirts (silly, I know)

Menu for Carl's birthday
Haystacks
Rice
Black Beans
Apple Pie

Presents
Kobalt tool set

Wonderful Weather

We have been blessed with such a wonderful winter. I mean, my kids have worn short sleeves a lot this season. Right now I am listening to them play outside on the new trampoline. The trampoline has been a great motivator in getting school work done by the way. Everyone has just been commenting on how great a winter this has been. This morning though the Lord showed me that not everyone is enjoying such a blessed winter. There was an article in the paper about the cold spell in Europe. Russia especially has been hard hit with temperatures hitting 30 below zero in some places. I cannot even imagine how cold that is. The Lord just caused me to look outside my own little world and see the suffering of others a world away. I have just been praying all day for the people in these areas. Especially the Christians. I pray that the missionaries in these areas would be blessed today. I pray that they would use this time to be able to reach people for God's name. The homeless and the poor are the ones that are dying. I pray that the Christians would reach out to them and help provide for their physical needs. In doing so I pray that they would be able to meet the spiritual needs of these people as well. That is what the Lords laid on my heart this morning. I pray that if you have a moment today pray for those experiencing a drastically different winter than we are.

Such a Blessed Day

As I sit here snuggled up with my two girls I reflect upon this day where we celebrated 13 years of being blessed with Alex. I am truly thankful for every day that the Lord has given me with him. He is a blessing. We did not actually get to see Alex on his true birthday, which was yesterday. He spent the past three nights at my Mom and Dad's celebrating with them. He had a blast just being by himself. They went to the Museum of Life and Science and Dick's Sporting Goods and Toys R Us. My mom presented him with a wonderful compass that had a cross on it. It was beautiful. He also got a lot of art supplies which he immediately put to use. Carl and I added to his art supplies too. We also got him his own t-shirts which may seem like a silly gift but Carl and Alex are always getting their t-shirts mixed up. They are very similar in size. He was excited because his are different than Carl's so they will easily be identified. We also got him a big present. He has wanted a trampoline for years and we finally bought one. The kids spent the whole day jumping. We invited a family from church over. They have six boys and one girl about the same ages as ours. Their oldest turns 13 in June. Their youngest turns 2 very soon. The kids had a blast jumping on the trampoline and playing video games. Sam and Caleb fell asleep early and now Tirzah and Esther are lying next to me. I took a bath and asked Esther to watch Tirzah. When I came out of my bathroom they were both sleeping snuggled up next to each other. I am truly a blessed woman. Despite all the struggles and trials of raising children who will bring glory and honor to God I am truly blessed. Raising children who have a strong relationship with the Lord is hard work. It has its moments where you want to give up and it seems like nothing will ever get better. It is the Lord giving us days like today that give me the strength to go on. This day was not without its challenges though. The trampoline had a piece that was defective. Sam screamed most of the day and I pulled a muscle in my back. Carl and I also had a disagreement over the trampoline. Despite all those things I say that I am truly blessed. I have a wonderful husband and eight healthy children. I have a God who loves me and only wants the best for me. A blessed life I have.

My first Teenager

Happy Birthday to my sweet Alex. I finally can say that I have a teenager. In the next few years that I have with you I hope that I can show you what it means to live a life for Christ. I pray that He will be your guide your whole life long. I pray for you every day. I pray that God would reveal to you the kind of man He wants you to be. God has gifted you with a wonderful opportunity in your artistic ability. He can use you in a great and mighty way if you let him. Never lose sight of who God is and what he has done for you. May your life be blessed. Pray to Him daily and read His Word every day. Lift up His Holy Name. Bring glory to Him in everything you do. You have such a sweet, caring spirit. Never let that go. Never forget that I love you no matter what. There is nothing you can do and no where you can go that will diminish my love for you. You are my son and will forever have my love. Never forget that the love a mother has for her son is nothing compared to the love the Father has for His children. May pleasing Him be the main focus of your life. I love you.

Mom

Anger

It seems like the Lord has been ever so gently revealing to me that anger is extremely destructive. Our ladies Bible study is going through Dr. S M Davis' series on anger (which is awesome and I highly recommend them). The first one is called Anger-The Destroyer. It was enlightening. I had listened to this before but it never really made me want to change. I always have known that I have had an anger problem but I did not know how to fix it. I thought that it was fine for a mom to yell at her kids because it made them obey. What I did not realize is that I have trained my children to respond only when my voice reaches a certain level. I have trained them to be just as angry as I am. When I look at Tirzah I realize that I need to change so that I do not start these bad habits with her. I have been studying scripture to see what the Bible has to say about anger and also reading books about it. I am amazed at the amount of books that I own that deal with this issue. Last night I prayed that the Lord would reveal something to me while I was reading my Bible. William and I are reading through the Bible in a year. It is convicting when you 11 year old son comes into your room and asks why you skipped a day. He has been very consistent as where I have had to catch up a few days. Anyway, I was reading in Proverbs 30 last night (which I have read many times before) when something jumped off the page.

If you have been foolish, exalting yourself,
or if you have been devising evil,
put your hand on your mouth.
For pressing milk produces curds,
pressing the nose produces blood,
and pressing anger produces strife.
(Proverbs 30:32-33 ESV)


Wow! I never saw that before. My anger produces strife in my children. I mean I know that. We all know that. But do we really KNOW it? Do we really work to get rid of the anger in our lives. I have purposed this week and last week to and really from now on to make an effort to not let my anger show. I have been realizing how much I am angry. I have been trying to stop myself and literally "put your hand over your mouth." Let me tell you that when you have a habit and sin that has been so much a part of your life for many years that it is exhausting to try and stop. Through the strength of the Lord I have been having little victories these past two weeks. I have also had setbacks. I am learning what triggers me and what time of day is the worst for me. I am trying to laugh and enjoy my children more and be more consistent with my discipline. I am speaking to them gently and catching myself when my voice gets agitated. Oh my, am I tired. But this is what God calls me to do. To repent means a turning away from. I have resolved to turn away from my anger. I hope you will pray for me as I endeavor to teach my children to have a humble spirit by having one myself.

Things Overheard at the Trautman House This Week

From Daniel - as we were reviewing his letter sounds with flashcards
"A, B, C, D, E, Ribbit Ribbit." there was a picture of a frog for the letter F

Esther - this morning as we snuggled in bed
"Mommy, you stretch like a princess."

Me - to Caleb
"Don't you put that snake on my bed." referring to a rubber snake

Everyone
"I love you. I love you infinity and beyond." a game we play to see who can say it first after someone says I love you.

This Day

Do you ever have one of "those" days? You know, the kind where it seems like your kids are bent on driving you into the insane asylum. The kind where you think that they got together the night before just to think of ways to drive you crazy. Well, today was like that. It started off with waking up late. Me, not them. That is never a good start. When your two year old comes and climbs up in your bed and has an apple in his hand it is never a good sign. Breakfast went okay but that was only because I made smoothies, which happens to be their favorite. Alex was the last one to get up, as usual. I yelled up that stairs that if he was not dressed and down in the kitchen in five minutes that I was going to drink his smoothie. I heard a crash upstairs and the frantic movement of feet and he flew down the stairs withe seconds to spare. I was looking forward to that smoothie too. I sent the kids outside to play after I thought the kitchen was cleaned up (my mistake for trusting that an 12, 11, and 10 year old would actually do their morning chores correctly.) I had to call each of them back in to redo their jobs the right way (any other mother get tired of training their children to do the same chore 100 times.) The screaming started outside with Daniel not getting his way and that just set Sam and Caleb to screaming too. I think that if someone had been walking down the road they would have thought a murder was occurring. That was the way it was all day. No one was happy with anything. I decided to get some exercise this morning and, horror of horrors, I told them that we were going to, wait for it, the park!!!! They simultaneously erupted into crying and whining. I just stood there in shock. They love to go to the park. I was absolutely in an utter state if confusion. I packed everyone in the car and began to wonder where Alex was. I walked to the back yard only to find my oldest son with a hose watering the hill. I yelled at him to cease and desist only to have him look at me and ask why. Why? Why can you NOT make my backyard into a mud pit? Why can you NOT make a mud slide out of the hill? I began to not so calmly explain the hundred reasons why. The laundry, the slipping and falling flat on your face. The fact that you won't be able to get back up the hill. He wanted to take the sleds and literally make a slide out of mud. He could not understand why I was so angry. Could it be that I had just told all of them that they could not slide down the hill until the sun dried up the ground a little bit more. Well, I finally got everyone in the car, after threatening to leave Caleb in the house. He was standing at the door yelling at me in words I could not comprehend but he got his point across. I should have just stayed home and put them all in chairs and had training time. The park trip went well. Back home we had lunch which again was a favorite of the kids, baked potatoes with fixins. After putting Caleb down for a nap I sent the kids outside. Esther and Daniel got into a fight over, wait for it, a stick. No joke. Last week I had confiscated a stick that literally was in the shape of a gun. No lie. The kids all wanted it so I took it away and hid it. Esther found it today and Daniel proclaimed that it was his. Esther's solution to the problem was to take it out in the backyard and throw it into the neighbors back yard which is full of kudzu. Daniel meanwhile is following her screaming at the top of his lungs. I am following both of them trying to figure out what the problem is. If I had a camera I would have won AFV. Well, needless to say, Esther and Daniel both ended up being disciplined and spending some time in chairs. Right when I finally had peace and was going to start some chores I needed to get done baby girl woke up and needed to nurse. By the time I was done with her the kids were done playing outside, Caleb was up, and it was time to start dinner. I hate clocks. I got dinner all ready and warming in the oven for when Carl came home. I sat down and wanted to take a nap only to deal with Caleb and Sam screaming over toys. Caleb kept trying to tell me something about his finger but with his limited vocabulary he resorted to yelling and shoving his finger in my face. Sam meanwhile decided he wanted a red apple immediately even though I had already told him, and Esther, and Daniel, and Nathan, and everyone else, that no they could not have a snack 10 minutes before dinner. I was exhausted when Carl came home. I told him that after dinner I had to go upstairs and clean our room, which really was not a lie. Our room looked like someone taken every piece of clothing from the entire house and dumped it on our floor. I now have all the kids in bed and am sitting here with Tirzah plastered to my hip. That is the only way she will go to sleep at night. The dryer is going, the downstairs is clean (or at least I hope - I have not been down to check yet), and my room now has a floor that is clear of clothing, dirty diapers, hot wheel cars, bakugan, playmobile people, legos, rubber snakes (yes, I did find one under the bed), and an assortment of other toys that my children gifted me with. I sit here and realize that not every day will be like today. It makes me so glad that the Lord gives me just enough strength for this day. This day with all the whining and fighting. This day where I know I could have handled things better. This day where I let my children get away with too much. This day that leaves me feeling discouraged and in need of a hug. I can come before God and ask forgiveness. I can seek his wisdom to make changes to my day to make things run smoother. I can crawl into his arms and get the encouragement I need to go on. I can go to bed knowing that tomorrow I get a new day to try and bring glory and honor to a gracious and merciful God. Yes, today I made mistakes, but tomorrow is a new day and God will give me the exact amount of strength that I need to get through everything that will happen. This evening I am thankful that i can come before God and confess my sins and that he removes those sins as far as the east is from the west. So yes, today was hard but tomorrow is almost here and I get another shot to do it all over again.

Encouragement

Today was the Kids Exchange. I have been going through the kids clothes and the entire house to purge things and see what we need. I went with a specific list of things that I needed for each child. I found everything on my list. It was like the Lord went before me and allowed me to find just what I needed. I was even very close to my budget (Esther's comforter pushed me over $30.) I took Esther with me and she was such a helper. It was so encouraging to see how helpful she was. She watched Tirzah and took care of her the entire time. It was kind of funny watching people's reaction when she changed Tirzah's diaper which happened to be one of the cloth ones. It made my heart glad to see what a wonderful girl she is. That was the first way I was encouraged today. The second came in the form of a lady I do not know. While I was looking for shoes for Sam and Caleb another mother and I got to talking. She asked me what size I was looking for and I laughed and said all. With the boys in the house someone will eventually fit into them. She asked me how many kids I had and I told her. Instead of the wide eyed, open mouthed silence I normally get she responded with a big smile and told me how blessed I was. She had a little one in a sling and she told me that it was her fifth baby. We had a good conversation about the church we attend and I found out that she is one of 11 kids, 8 boys and 3 girls. It was such an encouragement to talk to someone who values children as Carl and I do. We later saw her on another isle and Esther was with me this time. She told Esther what a good big sister she was and how she was such a blessing to me. Esther's smile was huge. The third way I was encouraged today came in the form of an old friend. This friend went to our old church. She is now homeschooling her children and I am so glad. She commented that she has enjoyed reading my blogs and I was floored. I thought no one read my blog. I really have been writing just to so my kids could look back one day and have some recorded memories of growing up. I was so encouraged that the words that the Lord gives me could brighten the lives of others, especially women who are in the same stage of life as I am. Raising children is no easy task, especially if you want to do it in a way that honors and glorifies God. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in our lives, the diapers and discipline and cleaning, the laundry and meals and schooling, that we forget that their are women who need our help. We all can encourage one another, even if it just saying hi and giving a smile. Sometimes it seems like I can go the whole week and not speak to another person over the age of 12, except my sweet husband. It should not be that way. Yes, our focus needs to be on raising our children and being a help meet to our husbands. Let us not forget though that we are to encourage and uplift one another. We need to seek out friendships with those who are of a like mind and reach out to those we see hurting and need Jesus. Finding that balance is something I need to work on everyday. My world is not just my kids and my house and my husband. The world is full of people who need to hear my words of encouragement just like I need to hear yours. So, if you read my blog I am praying that the ramblings of this mother in the midst of being a help meet to a pretty fantastic guy and raising eight wonderful blessings for the glory of God will bring you some encouragement and maybe a laugh or two. I pray that whatever encouragement you get here you will pass on to another soul that needs it. Look for opportunities to encourage those around you and don't just limit it to those you know. The cashier at Walmart just may need to smile. The mom you see struggling with her two year old who is screaming in Target my just need a a look that lets her know that you know how she feels and also a prayer lifted up on her behalf. That man you see in the Bojangles may just need a simple hello to make his day. Ask the Lord to send people your way that need encouragement. He will answer that prayer so be on the lookout.
I have been trying to post a picture every day this year so here is today's. Enjoy.

NC Sledding

It does not snow too often in North Carolina. This winter in particular hhas been very mild. Today it was around 70 degrees and beautiful. I kicked the kids outside and told them to find something to do. They decided to go sledding. We had bought them sleds for Christmas and they have been bummed that they have not been able to use them. We have a steep slope in the back yard that leads down to the creek. They decided to see if the sleds would work on the dirt. They were thrilled when they did! They spent the whole day taking turns. It was so cute to see the older ones helping Sam and Caleb go down the hill. At 5:30, when it finally got dark, I had to drag them in. It really made me smile to see Nathan and Esther helping Caleb up the steep slope. It was so cute. Esther and Sam would go down with their arms wrapped around one another. It was good to see them working and playing together. Sometimes they act like they really hate each other. Today though I was able to see that they do enjoy being in the same family. What a joy to see them together. I am truly blessed.

PRIVACY!

In a house full of 10 people it is very hard to find some privacy. In our house of seven males and three females the bathroom is not even a sacred place (unless you lock the door and not even then due to the incessant banging that takes place.) There is no way for the kids to have their own rooms. Can you imagine how much space 9 bedrooms would take up? We were rearranging the bedrooms this weekend and Alex, who is turning 13 next month, requested some space of his own. Every available space in this house is occupied with someone of something. The kids have their fort outside but the weather is too cold for them to go out and play for long periods of time. I came up with a pretty creative solution for Alex. I told him that I would make some sort of partition for his bottom bunk. I had some left over fabric from some Christmas projects and he and I sewed (yes, boys can sew too). He had so much fun making the panels. We made them so he could tie them to the upper bunk. He is able to climb in and out of bed and them pull the panels closed so he has some semblance of privacy. He is so excited and now all the kids want me to make them for their beds. I don't mind except the upper bunks are going to prove challenging. Oh well. It was awesome to see how excited he got over that little bit of space he can completely call his own. He is getting older and I realize that he needs that space just for him. I can't believe that in 5 short years that he will be 18. That is a sobering thought when I think of all the things I still want to teach him. He is such a precious boy who has such a sensitive spirit. He has been struggling the last few years but I see him finally starting to mature and move into a new stage of his life. I pray daily that the Lord would use him greatly. I pray that God would be the major priority of his life and that he draw closer to Him. I love you Alex!

Not a Sick Day but a Sick Week

This week has not been what I expected. I think I know why the Lord gave me two extra hours of sleep on Sunday. He knew that I would need it this week. Caleb has been recovering from an ear infection he had last week. He has been very cranky. Esther started to feel bad on Sunday right in the middle of church. She had a fever and a headache. Tirzah started feeling bad that night. She had a high fever and was generally feeling very cranky, which is not like her. We were able to get some clean up and school done on Monday. Tuesday was a sick day because Tirzah was at the doctor's and was fussy. All she wanted to do was be held. Monday night Sam had a fever and headache and slept in our room. He and Tirzah did not get up until almost 10:30 in the morning. Tirzah was horrible on Tuesday. She would not eat and was starting to get dehydrated. She did not have any wet diapers all day. I took her back to the doctor on Tuesday evening. She finally started to nurse Tuesday night, all night. I got hardy any sleep. Wednesday all Tirzah wanted to do was nurse and sleep, in my arms. I laid on the couch all day with her. I did not feel well either. I was so tired from being up all night with the sick kids. In the midst of all this William got sick with the same thing. Alex was also dealing with pink eye along with Sam. I was at the doctor this morning with Alex because with the eye drops he was actually getting worse. They prescribed a stronger eye drop for him because he is in such pain. I have been at the doctor's Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday. I am exhausted and stressed out. We have been doing nothing but laying around and watching television. I pray that I don't get sick along with the kids. Everyone seems to be on the mend now. I now that Lord has a plan for everything even all that has occurred this week. The grandiose plans I had for organizing the house and doing school went out the window this week. I guess I just needed a break this week along with everyone else. I have had my moments this week that have not been ones I want people to witness. I have been stressed out and exhausted from not sleeping well all this week. The Lord has been working on my heart this week in the midst of all the sickness. He has been revealing areas I need to work on that I thought I had been doing well in. I need to be in the word more and seeking His guidance.

A Problem I Can't Fix and One I Can

Having sick little ones is always so draining for me. Especially when there is really nothing I can do. Caleb had a fever and ear infection last week. Esther has had a headache and fever since church on Sunday. Tirzah has had a swollen eye and an ear infection too. Sam put himself to bed last night because he did not feel well. Tirzah did not sleep well last night and really did not get to sleep until after 1. She woke up at 5 with a very high fever. We gave her medicine only to have her throw it all up and everything she ate last night. She is finally asleep again after a cool bath. Sam is also in our room sleeping after he woke at 5:30 and needed medicine. There are a few others who feel warm to me as I walked in every room to check on them. It is going to be a jammy day at the Trautman house today as I am exhausted already and it is not even 7:00 in the morning. Please pray for my little guys, especially Tirzah who seems to be the worst.
It got me to thinking though as I lay awake last night trying to console Tirzah. This is a sickness that I just need to let run its course. I can only treat the symptoms. I can't make them well or take this away from them as much as I want to. It hurts to see them suffer. It breaks my heart. But, there is a problem that I can help them fix. There is a cure for their sin problem. They are born with a sin nature that is sending them to hell as a punishment. But I know the cure and I need to teach them what it is. As much as we mothers want our children be healed when they are sick we should want them to fix their sin problem more. We have a cure for that and his name is Jesus. Am I on my knees seeking the Lord on how to guide them to Him as much as I pray for healing when they are physically sick.? Do I spend as much time and effort on teaching them who Jesus is as I am on healing them when they have a virus and don't feel well physically? Their physical sicknesses are draining and bothersome but what will I do if I lose them to the world? Now, I know that it their own personal decision to accept Christ but I should be putting more effort into their spiritual well being than I do into their physical well being. Can I say at the end of the day that I am exhausted from trying to lead them to a spiritual cure? If not then I am not doing my job as a mother. I need to be exhausted from being on my knees interceeding for my children. I need to be exhausted from reading the Bible in preparation for dealing with the problems they may have. I need to be exhausted from learning ways to bring them to the Lord. I need to be exhausted from spending time with them and teaching them who He is. Yes, I am tired from taking care of their sick bodies but I need to be more tired from taking care of their spiritual well being.

A Day of Rest

Our family has literally been running since Thanksgiving. We have gone from Maryland and back and then to Virginia and back. We have visited Carl's parents, my sister, my parents, and numerous families from church. With a nursing infant I don't get too much uninterupted sleep to begin with. Tirzah likes to sleep snuggled up right next to me which is great for her but bad for my back. While at church today Esther got a headache. She came home and I gave her some medicine. She went and took a nap. Caleb took his regular afternoon nap. I had every intention of working in the garage to get it back to where Carl can put his car in. I went upstairs to change from my church clothes into more comfortable clothes. I guess they were too comfortable because I laid down on the bed for just a moment. The next thing I knew I woke up two hours later. My wonderful husband had taken Tirzah and "convinced" her to take a nap on the couch with him. I heard nothing from the kids or Carl. I guess my body needed to rest. Once I got up we had a leisurly dinner of leftovers or whatever the kids wanted to fix (within reason - Esther wanted me to make pancakes - I said NO). We watched the old version of Cheaper by the Dozen (a very appropriate movie for our family). My house is not going to implode just because it is a mess this evening. It is okay to rest once in a while. I know why the Lord put a day of rest in place. Sometimes as mother's though it seems like on those days of rest that we are the busiest. I have to find church shoes for eight kids. Make sure everything is ironed. Make sure the van is packed with the diaper bag. Make sure the bible bag is stocked with things to keep little ones occupied during church (we have no church nursery). I also have to prepare a meal for after church as we have a pot luck dinner after church every Sunday. I need to pack play clothes for some of the kids who want to change after church. I also need to get myself ready and nurse Tirzah. This is all before 9:00 when we have to leave for church. Oh, did I mention I need to feed everyone breakfast too. It is just the normal Sunday things a mom needs to do. I like to be productive when we get home because Carl and I don't have much time during the week to get things done. Sometimes though the Lord knows what we need even when we don't. He knew that today I needed an extra two hours of sleep. He is such a wonderful God to give us not what we want, but what we need. Oh what a wonderful Savior is he.

At the End of My Days

Carl and I attended the funeral of a co-worker of his today. He was a good friend to Carl and had known for quite some time that he was dying of cancer. Funerals always either depress me or encourage me. This one was an encouraging one because Carl and I truly believe that this man was saved and is now in heaven. It was amazing to see his son get up and talk about the man he was, especially as a father. It got me to thinking what will be said at my funeral. Will my children recall that I always kept a clean house? Will they say that I yelled at them a lot? Will they say that they had no fun growing up? Or will they say that I was kind and compassionate? That I always made them feel loved. That I made growing up fun. That I was joyful and always giving thanks to God. What will my children say at my funeral? I want them to remember that I made them each feel special and taught them the way to the Lord. I need to be reminded every once in while that my life is more than getting through each day. My goal should be what my children and grandchildren will say at the end of all my days. When I go to stand before my Lord what will my legacy be? Will it be a legacy that honors God and brings glory to his name? That is my goal. At the end of my days I want all the glory to go God.


This picture was taken in 2010 but it just expressed how I want my children to remember how they were raised. I love the simple joy of this photo.

Protectors

Today was not a good day for the littles around here. Caleb is still in pain from his ear infection so he spent the entire day crying. Sam and Daniel would play nice for a while and then mutiny would occur. I spent the day going from Caleb to Daniel to Sam. I lost count at the times I had to put the helmets and weapons back on lego figures (curse you lego company for making those little arms that want to pop off). Daniel had been playing outside with Esther for a little while (I was able to get a little break in the middle of the day). When he came in the house he threw his shoes on the floor. Now mind you, where he threw them was right in front of the shoe cubbies. I told him to put them away and he got mad at me and told me that William was supposed to put his shoes away (why William was responsible I am still trying to figure out.) He picked up his shoes and made a motion to throw one at me. Big no no. I was shocked but what happened next floored me. Alex was watching this all unfold. I watched him walk over to me, cross his arms and stand right in front of me looking at Daniel. He just stood there glaring at Daniel. Next thing I know Nathan comes over and joins him. So here I have Daniel with a shoe in his hand ready to launch it at me and two big boys standing in the way so that I am completely protected. I did not know what to say. Daniel got the message real quick and while still looking at his brothers with a look of astonishment on his face he slowly backed up and put his shoes in his box. I was speechless for a second but then went over and told Alex and NAthan thank you. I felt so proud of my protectors. I still tear up writing this. I hope that all my boys will be protectors for all their lives. May they never lose the desire to want to watch out for the women in their lives.

Here are a few photos from the day.

My Favorite Picture of the Day

I have been trying to post on Facebook at least one pitcure a day. I want to chronicle my life and that of my children. I have gotten in the habit of keeping the camera with me at all times. I have caught some really cute pictures of the kids, especially Tirzah. This evening, after I posted to Facebook, I took one more picture. It has to be my favorite that I have taken so far. It makes me smile the most. If you can't tell, William is reading his Bible. He has been reading it every night for quite some time now and it always makes me glad when I walk by his room and see it. It makes all the frustrating moments with my children worth it.

Good for a mother's heart

The other night I took Esther with me grocery shopping. Tirzah, Esther, and I had a great time of finding deals and dinner with just my girls. On the way home I had Pandora playing on my phone. I love to sing along with the songs. One of my favorite songs came on. It is Blessed by Laura Story. I kept hearing something as I was singing and it was not me or Laura Story. It finally dawned on me that the sweet noise I heard was my beautiful daughter singing along with every word in a sweet soprano voice that was in perfect key. I think that was an indication that I have listened to this song way to much. I had to stop singing because I started to cry. The next song came on and she sang along with that song too. It just encouraged me that our children are listening when we don't think they are.

I love Homeschooling

Sam wanted Tirzah to play with his power ranger toy. She was more interested in her pacifier. She is learning how to put it in her mouth herself.


This picture was just too cute not to post.


Esther started out just reading a book to Tirzah. The younger boys did not want to be left out.



This particular picture may be framed. I don't keep all the kids drawings. If I did my house would be overrun with nothing but paper. This one is a keeper though.


These were some things I caught going on during our first day back to school after the holiday.

Mommy in Training

Esther is such a little helper. She has really taken momma training to heart. When we found out Tirzah was a girl Esther was so excited to finally have a buddy. At times she protests the things I ask her to do but overall she is eager to help. She can change a cloth diaper like a pro. Getting her buckled in her seat is her regular job. She holds her like she has been taking care of babies for years. It is such a joy to see her wanting to take care of her and start her training to be a momma some day herself.